The guest list

In her book Weddings, Emily Post reminds something to pay attention of the guest list:
'
A guest list consists of a magical number of family and friends that 1) suits the size of your ceremony and reception sites, 2) corresponds with the level of intimacy desired for the wedding, and 3) can be accommodated within your wedding budget (an important reality). Traditionally, each family is allotted half of the desired total guest count, a figure largely determined by the person hosting the wedding. A way of starting to decide whom to invite is to combine four lists, thus formulating the master list. Start with lists from the bride, the groom, the bride's parents, and the groom's parents. It is necessary that everyone make up their lists realistically. As acceptances and regrets become known, the "weights" of the lists may vary.

Some decisions that may affect your numbers: Do you plan to include children? To invite single friends to bring guests? Neither inclusion is necessary, but both necessitate "proper etiquette," meaning consideration and sensitivity. If children are not invited, the proper way to communicate this is to write only the parents' names on the outer and inner envelopes. It is inappropriate to write "No Children" on the invitations. For the guest of a single friend, send a separate invitation to the guest, unless he or she lives at the same address.

Use all of the considerations just noted to arrive at a reasonable estimate. Then ask each half (or one-quarter) to compile a rough list of "must-have" guests, supplemented by "hopefuls" to be invited if there should be room. Remember to include in your count the officiant and his or her spouse, yourselves, both sets of parents, and your wedding party.

Cutting down an overambitious guest list is a difficult task requiring great tact, diplomacy, and even-handedness. If you know that distance will prevent certain people from attending, factor this in. To trim the guest list, try to redraw your lines equilaterally, bumping entire groupings of people--second cousins, work associates with whom you've never socialized, friends from the health club--to a "B" List. These people can be invited four weeks before the wedding if guests on the "A" List send regrets. Your list may read something like this:

• First Tier: immediate families (parents, siblings, grandparents, the couple's own children)
• Second Tier: extended family members (aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews)
• Third Tier: family friends (parents' close friends, long-time friends and neighbors, childhood friends and their parents, if close to you)
• Fourth Tier: parents' colleagues (associates, employers, employees)

This guide should be based upon what makes sense in your case. Any planning, of course, must be adapted to your particular circumstances. If you and your intended are established professionally, perhaps marrying for a second or third time, you will probably be paying for all or most of the wedding yourselves. Perhaps your wedding will take place far from your hometown or where your parents live. Under any of these circumstances, it could make sense to switch tiers three and four, as defined above.
'

A word about contracts in wedding

In her book Weddings, Emily Post reminds a word about contracts in wedding:
'
While the bride and groom are busy getting their personal documents in order before the wedding, they are also likely to be contracting for myriad services, from the photographer to the reception site to airline tickets and the honeymoon hotel.

How do you make sure that ultimately you get what you pay for? In a phrase: Get it in writing. If your agreement with the florist was to provide 12-inch-round floral centerpieces of roses and lilies and you arrive breathless at the reception to find jelly glasses holding daffodils, you have little recourse for a prive adjustment if what you agreed to is not written clearly in a contract. If your agreement with the caterer was for brandname liquor and you find the bartender pouring from house brand bottles, you will have trouble legally withholding full payment if that specification is not part of a contract.

It is assumed, of course, that you have done your homework carefully and checked references to ensure that you are not contracting with a disreputable or fly-by-night vendor, so you have every right to expect what you ordered. But you will have a hard time collecting if every requirement is not in writing.
'

Wedding Insurance

In her book Weddings, Emily Post introduced wedding insurance:
'
Weddings have taken place for centuries without wedding insurance, but no chapter on the legalities of getting married would be complete without including it as a topic of consideration for the bride and groom. In many instances, the cost of a wedding is so astronomical that the additional cost of insurance is worth every penny if it protects such a large investment.

Wedding insurance, offered exclusively by the Fireman's Fund insurance company (800-ENGAGED), may be taken out by a bride and groom to cover wedding catastrophes that are beyond anyone's control. Wedding insurance can also cover any retaking of photographs, replacement of lost or damaged wedding attire or wedding gifts, and public liability.

Wedding insurance is beneficial, for example, when a reception site suddenly cannot accommodate the party because a fire, damage, or a murder or suicide has occurred at the site, or an outbreak of a contagious disease has required a health department quarantine. Insurance will cover the cost of rebooking elsewhere.

If wedding insurance is a possibility, it is wise to consider every contingency when assessing the value and extent of the insurance you want. For example, if the reception site is suddenly not available and the wedding must be canceled because no other site is available on such short notice, other costs may be lost, such as formal-wear rental, car hire, hotel charges for the wedding party, and flower arrangements.
'